after reading up some blogs, i kinda regretted for saying the things i said to a friend. i'm in no position to psycho him on what to do. after all, in situations like this, either one will end up getting hurt.

rs is one funny thing. i don't think i can fully grab the entire meaning of it. come to think of it, no love in reality is like love in fairytales. we go on dates, talk over a cup of tea (teh), share about our interest and it goes on for years before the big M comes to mind. but in fairytales, the hero saves her, and poof! the big M is here.

does the duration of a rs really matters in answering the big M question? i thought what matters most is the level of comfort in each other lives? hmm.

anyway, this is an exciting week for me. i've cleared my ns medical checkup. i thought i might be posted to pes E status cuz of my eyes. guess i got the meaning of lazy eyes wrongly. hahas. thank goodness, i'm not in pes E! i don't want to chao geng in my army. why waste your 2 years doing nothing constructive in pes E? hahas. but yea, army stuffs cleared. just wait for letter to enlist next year. i seriously don't know if i should be excited or nervous. hahas.

project FINAL REPORT FINALLY SUBMITTED! what a HUGE HUGE HUGE boulder lifted off my back and head. and it'll sound so much better next week after my final review! which means, the rest of the time is for planning and preparation of the technofair in sch.

standchart run this sun. i didn't train much actually. but i think i should still be able to manage this short distance.

batam trip is confirmed with baby. im'ma checkout those singaporean uncles going there to spend all their retirement fund from cpf on ____________ ( well, you fill in the blanks). hahas. but of course, i'm looking forward to the cheap seafood and hopefully shopping there will be good.
i was wondering, why the hell would a couple go to a place like batam for holiday? hahas. batam is so not romantic and is so cheapo with a reputation of old singaporean men going there for their entertainments. hahas. but then again, it's cheapo. we're cheapskates!

i wanna go taiwan on the coming feb! ngee ann sucks la. by putting the exam period right after cny. wtf. SP have got their exams before cny. which means they get to enjoy cny all the way til sch reopen la. and cuz of NP's stupid final exam, out taiwan plans might not work out. sian.

=))

baby,

it was tho, a late and short evening, i could never agree more that it was indeed a peaceful and nice night. race entry pack collection and cars viewing was great. you promised to buy me one. ha! enchanted was fantastic, and it did kick off on a fairytale love. dim sum was great too! watching the merlion and some performers. and i felt so blessed to have you beside me. the chatters we had from esplanade to suntec, in search of the car, to gombak coffee shop for some good pancakes, to continued chats in the car at your place. i had fun. we love it. =))

i'm so sorry on what happened over the weekend. i didn't mean to miss you out on that. but i thought i wanted to talk to harry about some stuffs. i know i did wrong and i'm terribly sorry. i promise to keep my promises. let's not look what happened behind us. cuz i'm sure we have a bright future ahead of us to walk to. we are one special lovebirds, and i'm sure of that.

love can never be sweeter if there is no you. i'm down with diabetes cuz of this excessive sweetness i'm getting everyday. and soon enough, i'll be getting heart attack cuz my heart beats so fast whenever you plants your lips on mine. and for this, i only wanna be admitted to in your hospital bee.

i love you just like bees love honey! beez.

and i do believe on a happily ever after with you. we will be baby. =))




from your, big head. hahas.

and this post is dedicated to the 5 national rowers who are still missing in the Phnom Penh rivers, Cambodia.

it's sad to hear such tragedies. and i'm sure, similar boaters across Singapore is hoping that the missing will be found asap.

as much as every team based in Singapore, SPC is praying hard for you guys too. many individuals, but hearts are behind you guys in the boats.

be safe everyone.

i'm lost in my woods of words. it just didn't feel right. especially the part where the watery factory starts its production.

fuck.

and i'm still stuck in this shit.
argh.

i've been listening to this. nice song, great lyrics. =)

and if you guys can actually understand how we're doing, and how we went thru our lives, you wouldn't ay things like that and shrug it off with a huge laughter. we don't get our good times everyday. and let's say, where were you when some of us are going thru our bad times? did you even bothered to leave behind a consoling message? or perhaps a phone call or even offered a listening ear? not even a meetup to do some healing thingy? nope. being so comfortable in your comfort zones and take people's bad day as a topic for you to laugh at.

and it is this progression of a higher level. moving on into higher heights.

ppl come and go. friendships are made, some broken. i've got many friends, many ppl around me. but nothing beats the closest in me. looking back, i'm grateful to harry and alvin. the ones who became my shelter when my weather is rainy. and today, i'm being reminded by them again, that i'm now a different man. a man who should treasure life and its flavours as well.

and the sweetest flavours is my missy chua.

emo.

i have to say that i have the best gf in the world. but i'm not being the best bf for her. my little miss chua hui rong, is the nicest of all. nicest of all the girls around, nicest among all my ex, she's even nicer than the womans i have in my house! thanks for being so nice to me always. for tolerating all my nonsense like not controlling my drinking limits. for resisting the urge to scold me whenever i do something wrong all cuz you didn't want us to start our first argument. thanks for taking such great care of me when i'm drunk that night. for bringing me home, holding me in your arms. thanks for being there when i squat at my toilet bowl and vomit all the sakura stuffs i had before pubbing. thanks for spending the night with me. thanks for looking after the little baby boy in my house when no one is around to look after him. thanks for bringing smiles on my face all the time. and most importantly, thanks for the love you have for me. nothing beats this love. this one girl. we came from different backgrounds. went thru and seen different life experiences ourselves. we each had our own share of witnessing the lives of our friends. and tho it seems kinda the opposite from each other, but i'm sure this did not create any uncertainties in our rs.

i hate this girl. for making me falling so madly in love with her. she'll always be the nicest girl around!

and here i present you, us. =))


and not forgetting the brothers i have in my life. with a toast, we're made sworn brothers. no longer we're friends but brothers. joy and sorrow, loneliness and pain, we will all go thru it tgt.

and perhaps i'm contended with having my little girl, brothers, family and sufficient wealth to hang out with these ppl. i can never ask for more except these. and yes, more party is coming our way. more wild and crazy times coming our way. and yes, more surprises for baby and myself.

p.s. k box session made me reflect on all these. it's really good to sing our hearts out and let the song speak to our hearts once in a while. you guys should try it really!

long weekend

and so it was. it was a good weekend, and i obviously had fun. caught a little movie on wed, gameplan. good show it is. and yes, had sakura for dinner last night, to celebrate derrick's and mario's birthday. it was exactly a year when we celebrated it for them at sentosa hotel. which made all of us look like animals and of course, the stunt which mario pulled off! lol

well, this year is a little simple. just sakura and pubbing tgt with baby's friends. the 7 of us had 3 bottles of chivas, which made us look drunk. and i mean look drunk only. lol. it feels so nice to have such great company and gathering. i love crowds. especially when the crowds are all your friends.

and after last night, i'm gonna quit and be a good boy.

my life.

A walk so rough,

a journey that's tough.

many trillions of images,

buckets of full-filled emotions.

of the bad and of the good,

it all runs in my blood.

of the joys and the regrets,

it's made of smiles and sighs.

it's my life,

it's my life.

a note kept in a bottle.

left drifting in the vast seas.

went thru storms and calm,

but never got picked up by anyone.

you can put theblame on me,

you can put that blame on fate.

a tattoo speaks of art,

but removing them stains a scar.

it's my life,

li's my life.

embroidered on this cloth,

its colour fades with every wash.

i need more than a HDTV,

perhaps what i need is real clarity.

the visions are blurred not by lenses,

nor by any forms of distractions.

the confusions are eminent,

the courage is low.

it's my life,

it's my life.

being busy ain't a minus.

it keeps the minors away.

being busy tells of tired souls,

which translates to the big tears breakout.

a significance that seems simple,

too bad it's overshadowed by the anti-clockwise of time.

don't complain, be good.

it is just my rightful food.

it's my life,

it's my life.

took a look upon my hands.

stained with blood and dirt.

it's this hands that creates,

and it's this hands that destroys too.

read me a bedtime story pls,

a story with no ending.

a deep sleep is on the wishlist,

and santa, will i have my present this christmas for free?

it's my life, my life.

truly a life with spices and tastes.

the songs have lost its tunes,

the roses have its thorns.

my life my life.

20 years of quality life.

a million words to say,

but not one manages to sway.

of hate and love,

i'd love to have the latter.

where is it found?

where is it hiding.

enough of it spencer,

that's enough.

third fourteen.

first and foremost, happy birthday little one! say bye to your TEENage years and start saying hello to adulthood! speaking of which, time really passes by so fast. i seriously don't know what i spent my last 20 years of my life on. but hey, i'm 20 going on 21 alr!

but anyway, it's the first celeb i had with her ever since we got tgt. nonetheless, i hope you enjoyed the simple dinner at forbidden city, and as well as the coffee over at tcc. i hope you enjoyed the overnight stay as well, watching saw 4 late into the night. the early afternoon gym was enjoyable for you too, i hope. ha. and not forgetting the spag we made that night. and i hope you like my hair colour! hahas. oh ya, and the simple gift i had for you. you're just as exclusive as the gift. it's for someone like you. =)) let us shine as bright as the 5 tiny blings on it. =))

and i'm very much looking forward to our batam trip this coming dec. i want good seafood and some simple shopping. and hey, my family will be away during CNY period. which means, i have the entire house for myself, which means i have 2 cars for myself too!

time to sleep. and i have been dreaming bout bikes, watches, cars and glasses lately. i'm going oh-so crazy over it.

regatta.

and so, the races are over, the breaks are here. just a little recap on what happened over the weekend.

the 20 men's crew got eliminated during the heats. we could've got into the semi's but were a little unlucky on the timing. we fall short of the milli-seconds. but hey, we were up against big teams in the heats like ntu, mountbatten csc where most of their rowers are national rowers.

however, the 20 mixed crew did pretty well in the heats and advanced into semi's. in which, we moved on into the plate's finals and clinch the plate's finals champion. and as for the 10 men crew, we did get into the semi's. but we lost in the semi's at 4th position because the races in both our mixed crew and 10 men crew were back to back races.

it's really an experience for me in this regatta. our heats, semi's and plate's finals were up against many big teams. canadian dragons, ngee ann, ntu, sim, nus, rp etc etc. but the team manage to sustain the competition. we don't see them as threats. instead, we are their threats. not forgetting the fact that a handful of us were rookies paddlers. but we manage to stand strong, fight hard, and get what we want in this regatta.

tho not many silverwares this time round, this race have made many SPCers see for themselves that we've taken a step further in our progress. from sava, to regatta. a fair margin of improvement. but however, we must strive to improve more.

ngee ann was very impressive in this regatta. their performance is fantastic, clinching men's national champion and as well as IVP champions. it was a good show, and definately an honour to be able to race alongside with them.

many dramas in this regatta. fierce competition. clashes. capsizing.

looking back, i've laid down uncountable sacrifices for this sport. but i've also taken alot out of it. of the times i wished i had more time for myself, today, i felt it's all worth me giving up many of my free time to commit to the many training sessions per week. i've made many good friends, i've understood the power of teamwork. it has taught me that with the correct state of mind, we can achieve things we never thought we can in our lifetime. i've see many different individual hearts coming together to train. but when we're in the boat rowing, i see not many hearts. but one big heart and soul, on passionate fire, to train together as a team. the motivations, the scoldings, the pain, the joy. it was all worth it. =))

i hate to face the fact that this might be my last race. hopefully, i'm able to make it for MR500 on the coming march, before i enlist for ns.

but anyway, here's a pic of me taken during lecture. was kinda bored with friends and so we started taking pics. i didn't know i have such sexxxxxxxeeeeeeeyyyyy legs. hahas.

and now, i kinda missed the sun, sand, sea water at kallang. hahas. i missed the good ol' tough training during this 2 or 3 weeks break. and the great company too!

sat, an early celebration dinner for cutie's birthday at indochine ACM. happy birthday sweetie! so sorry that i'm always so busy recently. our meetups are limited to late night short meetings instead of a entire day out for dating. thanks for being so understanding all these while. and this weekend, i promise we'll enjoy from sat all the way to sun. =))

til then guys, see ya!

SRR

months of tough training, tonnes of lessons to learn. the pain, the joy, the frustrations, the sweat, the tears, the bleeding and many more. tomorrow's results, will be the fruits of our labour.

22hearts. one boat. one soul on fire.

Singapore River Regatta 2007.

tears, symbolizes the utmost desire, to break free from a certain bondage.

and Singapore River Regatta 2007, here we come.

good night spent.

a night out with some buddies after training, was indeed enjoyable and fun. it all started with the desire for some little hip hop action, in which i sat there and watch the entire show, to traveling all the way to west coast for supper.

it was a great night, with the cool breeze and light traffic. it seems that the moon is fading, and the stars are losing its shine. or perhaps something is wrong with my appreciation for these supposedly beautiful mother nature. too much have happened recently. too many shit going through my life lately. and i simply refuse to talk about it cuz i just don't feel like it. ppl ask why am i so crazy all the time, cracking lame jokes and doing lame stuffs while smiling and laughing happily so naturally. but i do have my bad hair days, and i didn't expect them to be this worse this time.

call it running away from my foes of thoughts, but i simply don't have the courage to face what i'm feeling right now. i do have many great and wonderful friends around. whom they have their own share of problems. they talk about it all the time, and perhaps a problem shared is a problem halved. i thought by keeping myself busy with all my commitments would prolly distract me from all these. but instead, it turned itself into an ugly monster. i train hard, which resulted in my shoulder injury. i work hard, which resulted me not getting enough good sleep.

i wished i could hug an angel and cry my hearts out under its wings, but it's impossible. i just want to have fun, not getting reprimanded for the fun i'm having. if god would save the queen, why wouldn't he save me?

perhaps my buddies are right. i should probe into the pasts. that'll leave my questions answered. but i don't want to talk about it. at least for now.

we all search enthusiastically for romance. and indeed, this search ain't easy. but romance is like chocolates. some sweet, some bitter. however, in the context of chocolates alone, i love bitter chocolates. =) as the name suggests, my chemical romance ain't mixing well. this weird potion is turning my heads round and round and round.

i miss driving around late into the night. i miss the excitement in my life. i miss the surprises i get from life.

but i hate this fatigue i get from life.

it is often said that it takes 2 hands to clap. but it's also often said that there's 2 sides to a coin. at some point of time, a particular side will be over the other when it's flipped. it is tough to get an equal balance of both. which kinda suggest that some will give in more than the other.

no matter what crap i get from life, i did however, managed to appreciate a little about mother nature. sold some of my time at night safari in exchanged for monetary gains, gave me an opportunity to take free tram rides and watch free animal shows. of all the animals i've seen, i'm most in awe of the ones such as the rhino, hippo, elephants, tigers, lions. it is interesting to see how on earth did the creator manage to carve out such huge and wonderful animals. i told myself, if i'm rich one day, i'm gonna adopt the rhino, lions and tigers. i want the full grown elephants too! i love animals! and maybe one day, i might want to be a zoologist. it's true that one must be truthful to oneself, simply by doing the things you like. why work for a bank when your interest is in advertising?

life is weird. it is often hard to do the things we want. and i wonder what kind of lessons are we suppose to take out of it.

2 days to regatta. and i'm not sure if having this 3 weeks break is a good thing for me.

bring the colours of the moon and stars back to me can?